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F1 Jokes


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#1 ZenSpeed

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Posted 06 January 2010 - 17:22

Just heard from a friend: how did LdM convince Max Mosley to compromise on 2010 F1 regulations? he told him "listen Max, F1 without Ferrari is like an orgy without whips"......

Edited by ZenSpeed, 06 January 2010 - 17:23.


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#2 potmotr

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Posted 06 January 2010 - 17:24

Luca Badoer?

#3 ZenSpeed

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Posted 06 January 2010 - 17:25

Luca Badoer?

:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :clap:

#4 jeze

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Posted 06 January 2010 - 17:32

Luca Badoer?


Look how bad you are?

:rotfl:

#5 Jackmancer

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Posted 06 January 2010 - 18:11

Schumi and DC are in a desert. Evening comes, they set up their tent. Both go to sleep. DC wakes up in the middle of the night. Schumi isn't in the tent. He can hear something coming from outside the tent. DC peeps out and sees Schumi running around the tent like crazy, a big lion after him... DC: Run faster, he's gonna catch you! Schumi: Don't
worry, I lead by three laps...

#6 olliek88

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Posted 06 January 2010 - 18:18

What is the difference between Ralf Schumacher and God?

God knows he is not Ralf Schumacher



Why is David coulthard so popular with the ladies?

Because he lets his partner come first!


Ferrari took a decision for the British GP to hire a couple of Scousers as pitcrew members when they found out they can remove all 4 wheels in under 0.8 seconds. But to ferrari's dismay, after 1.5 seconds, the car was resprayed and sold to Mclaren....

Edited by olliek88, 06 January 2010 - 18:19.


#7 ZenSpeed

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Posted 06 January 2010 - 18:22

Schumi and DC are in a desert. Evening comes, they set up their tent. Both go to sleep. DC wakes up in the middle of the night. Schumi isn't in the tent. He can hear something coming from outside the tent. DC peeps out and sees Schumi running around the tent like crazy, a big lion after him... DC: Run faster, he's gonna catch you! Schumi: Don't
worry, I lead by three laps...

:rotfl:

#8 Ruf

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Posted 06 January 2010 - 18:30

An old tifoso passed away and goes to F1 heaven. At the Pearly gate Peter welcomes the frightened soul and tries to comfort him.
"Look my son, it's not bad at all here. All the greats are here. Plenty of racing all day long on the old circuits not the castrated ones you had lately, you'll enjoy it!"
The man's happy to hear all that and rushes in. A few days later Peter meets the man again.
"How you feel now my son?"
"Oh it's wonderful! I watched all the greats racing on the old Nordschleife, I even met Il Comendatore! It's great. But... I have a small question"
"Yes son, what is it?" "You see, every now and then I see a new Ferrari driven by someone dressed all in red and he also has a red helmet... How can that be?"
Peter looks left and right scared and says"
"Shhhh, not so loud! That's God thinking he's Schumacher"


#9 Soapy9963

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Posted 06 January 2010 - 18:47

An old tifoso passed away and goes to F1 heaven. At the Pearly gate Peter welcomes the frightened soul and tries to comfort him.
"Look my son, it's not bad at all here. All the greats are here. Plenty of racing all day long on the old circuits not the castrated ones you had lately, you'll enjoy it!"
The man's happy to hear all that and rushes in. A few days later Peter meets the man again.
"How you feel now my son?"
"Oh it's wonderful! I watched all the greats racing on the old Nordschleife, I even met Il Comendatore! It's great. But... I have a small question"
"Yes son, what is it?" "You see, every now and then I see a new Ferrari driven by someone dressed all in red and he also has a red helmet... How can that be?"
Peter looks left and right scared and says"
"Shhhh, not so loud! That's God thinking he's Schumacher"



:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :up: :up: :up:

#10 Rebbeharc

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Posted 06 January 2010 - 23:09


Fernando Alonso walks into a bar with a steering wheel down his pants

Barman: Hey Fernando, do you know you have a steering wheel down your pants?

Alonso: Yeah I know. It's drivin' me nuts!


#11 ZenSpeed

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Posted 06 January 2010 - 23:46

Fernando Alonso walks into a bar with a steering wheel down his pants

Barman: Hey Fernando, do you know you have a steering wheel down your pants?

Alonso: Yeah I know. It's drivin' me nuts!

:rotfl:

#12 FreeRider

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Posted 07 January 2010 - 00:08

From Frankie Boyle's standup show:

What’s going on with David Coulthard and that jaw thing? I bet when he goes down on his wife, it feels like she’s being rescued by a dolphin.

#13 Sausage

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Posted 07 January 2010 - 03:53

From Frankie Boyle's standup show:

What’s going on with David Coulthard and that jaw thing? I bet when he goes down on his wife, it feels like she’s being rescued by a dolphin.


Well.. thank you for posting that, now I have orange juice all over my screen and keyboard.

#14 glorius&victorius

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Posted 07 January 2010 - 13:16

USF1

#15 Jackmancer

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Posted 07 January 2010 - 13:24

USF1


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#16 TheF1PERSON

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Posted 07 January 2010 - 18:29

Good jokes here. Sadly, I can't think of any good ones.

#17 Monstrobolaxa

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Posted 07 January 2010 - 19:19

In 2001 pre-season testing was cancelled at Estoril due to fog!
In the middle of a field a rabbit and a snake cross paths....the snack starts feeling the rabbit and says:
- long ears, nice furr, cute tale and 2 long teeth...are you a rabbit? asks the snake!
- yeah...let me guess....smooth skin, no ears...humm...are you Niki Lauda?

#18 olliek88

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Posted 07 January 2010 - 19:22

[quote name='Monstrobolaxa' date='Jan 7 2010, 19:19' post='4068850']
In 2001 pre-season testing was cancelled at Estoril due to fog!
In the middle of a field a rabbit and a snake cross paths....the snack starts feeling the rabbit and says:
- long ears, nice furr, cute tale and 2 long teeth...are you a rabbit? asks the snake!
- yeah...let me guess....smooth skin, no ears...humm...are you Niki Lauda?]

seriously not funny.

Edited by olliek88, 07 January 2010 - 19:22.


#19 ForeverF1

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Posted 07 January 2010 - 19:29

Guys, it has become abundantly clear that, jokes, for some, are not 'jokes'. Therefore, this thread needs to be closed.