This guy is a real peice of work...
What is the dumbest thing you ever said to a woman in
bed?
Tomas: "This is your sister's favorite position as
well."
What was the worst thing you ever spent money on?
Tomas: I bought a Ferrari and sold it after a week. I
just hated it. I think Ferraris are for old men who
want to get laid by girls who are 20 years younger.
Maybe one day I'll want that, but just not right now.
What's the most interesting conversation you've had
with your team during a race?
Tomas: When I started singing to them on the radio,
"I got ho's in different area codes."
When was the last time you learned something intimate
about women?
Tomas: One of my friends once asked me how I know
when a woman has had an orgasm. I said, "You can
tell by the way her body moves." He said, "I have a
fool- proof method. Give the girl a kiss on the lips,
and if her lips are cold she has had an orgasm."
What's the story with you always going to chick
flicks?
Tomas: I always find myself having to go to chick
flicks. I don't know why. Every time I leave I say,
"That's the last time," and I always get sucked into
doing it again.
What do you guys call race- car groupies?
Tomas: "Pit bicycles," because everybody rides them.
What do you remember most about your first girlfriend?
Tomas: She wouldn't put out.
What was the worst thing you ever put in your mouth?
Tomas: Chewing tobacco. I was nine years old.
What has been your most embarrassing date experience?
Tomas: I was out with the guys, and they got me drunk.
I started kissing this girl, and when I woke up the
next day I found her number by my phone. I decided to
give her a call. I said, "I don't want to be rude. I
had a little too much to drink last night, and I
don't remember what you look like." She said she was
a model, so I asked her to go out that night. I
picked her up and ended up spending the evening with
the dodgiest bird ever. I don't know what she was
modeling- maybe socks.
Have you ever crashed during a race, and how bad were
the injuries?
Tomas: This past year at one of my races I suffered a
bruised heart, a bruised lung, and I tore all the
muscles in my back. I suppose it's just a part of
racing. Before I came to America I didn't take
injuries so seriously but when you start to race on
ovals in America you have the threat of hitting a wall
at 200 miles per hour, and I did. For me, my approach
hasn't changed since hitting the wall.
How do American women compare to others around the
world?
Tomas: American women for the most part all have big
tits for some reason. It's nice, but I'm a leg man.
Holland has some beautiful women. Italy as well, but
the language barrier can be a problem. Girls from
England, though, are pretty nasty looking.
Do you consider yourself much of a practical joker?
Tomas: There was a time in South Africa when bombings
were happening a lot. Well, one day I decided to set
off firecrackers in the bathroom at school. All the
kids were lying on the ground crying and screaming,
thinking that there had been some type of attack. The
teachers nailed me and I was suspended.
How would you compare a night of bliss with your
girlfriend to that of winning a race?
Tomas: I always say winning is better than sex.
There's a good 15 minutes from the time you cross the
finish line that you are just on cloud nine.
Is sex on the schedule the night before a race?
Tomas: My dad always said no sex before a race
because it makes you too aggressive, but I later
read a book by a well-known race-car driver who said
you should never change your routine. If you're
having sex regularly, don't stop things just because
you have a race the next day
Why do some of your fans call you "the tiger"?
Tomas: I got suspended from the first few days of
testing prior to the Indy 500, and my first day back
the fans were chanting, "Let the tiger loose!"
When was the last time the cops nailed you for
speeding?
Tomas: A week ago. I was going 75 in a 45 zone. It
cost me a hundred bucks.
Have you ever considered having sex in your race car?
Tomas: No. I've had offers, but it would be very
tight. For me, it wouldn't be such a thrill.
We all have a double out there. Name one person that
people say you look like.
Tomas: Jason Biggs from American Pie. It's not so
great. The guy was known for screwing pies.
When is it okay to call a girl a bitch?
Tomas: From behind.
Describe yourself in five words or less.
Tomas: [No answer]
