The reaction in those questions, to me, smacked of people who don't like being lied to. I understand that feeling.
If I were in Ferrari's shoes and if team orders were legal, I would have done exactly the same as they did. I can't criticise them for it, other than to say it's possibly against one of the rules (a silly one, IMO, but it's there).
The frustrating thing is all the lying. Every statement coming out of Ferrari just says "we think you are all idiots and will buy this bull sh*t". People don't like having their intelligence insulted. Claiming Felipe wasn't ordered to let Alonso through is just that.
No, it isn't. If they had come out during the race and said: "Felipe, let FA through. It's a team order", then yes. However, those words have never been uttered during the race and Ferrari can point to a throttle malfunction for Massa as being the reason why Alonso passed him.