52 replies to this topic

[AvranaKern]

In order to avoid traffic in Monaco, only the drivers with even numbered cars shall enter into the Event.

 

 

[Gilles4Ever]

I guess everyone then picks an even permanent number. 

[stanga]

In honour of the gracious nobility that now owns F1, all pitcrews are to be replaced by workers recruited exclusively from the sub-continent; they will be paid sod all, prevented from going home to see their families and will not be allowed to breathe the same rarefied atmosphere as their betters. 

 

Not much change then.

[AvranaKern]

I guess everyone then picks an even permanent number. 

 

Then comes the mid-season regulation change stipulating a prime number rule.

[HuddersfieldTerrier1986]

All drivers must race on the wrong type of tyre for the first 3 laps and the final 3 laps in each race. If the track is wet for the first 3 laps or the final 3 laps you must use slicks. If the track is dry for the first 3 laps or the final 3 laps you must use full wets.

[R Soul]

Article 1485.334 (a)

"In order to prevent anyone dominating, any driver who scores enough points at any grand prix to put him in the lead of the championship, with his points total exceeding that of his nearest rival by 105%, will be banned from all subsequent races until the first race at which his lead is less than 102% of the driver in second place."

 

Article 2014.666 (d)

"Any race steward will be obliged to place a bet worth the value of a 75% mortgage on the championship being decided in the final race of any season in which the steward is involved in at least one grand prix."

 

Article 1939.1945 (b) (ii)

"Any driver who does not praise the Pirelli tyres whenever he speaks to any journalist, fan, relative, dog or cat will have his superlicense revoked and his passport confiscated until he issues a full retraction and pays a fine of US$1000000."

[alfa1]

Article 111.1

All new regulations must have the intended effect of adding "spice" to the show, and increasing TV rating.

[HuddersfieldTerrier1986]

Article 111.1

All new regulations must have the intended effect of adding "spice" to the show, and increasing TV rating.

 

Article 111.1.1

All drivers must nominate a spice to throw around on the podium when they reach it.

[jonpollak]

Article 122.1-69

All 'super smashing great' ideas devised from political buddy boy binge drinking and hooker hoeing need an evenings reflection before passing into legislation...

Jp

[uffen]

The driver with the most points at the end of the season must swap his maximum points from a race (25 currently, possibly 50 next year) with a driver at the bottom of the rankings. That driver then gets to select which race will close the next year's season.

[Doughnut King]

Article X: Whenever a car gets 2 seconds ahead of the car behind, that car shall be limited to a number of RPM so that the car behind can catch up.

 

Article X2: The last event on the calendar shall have a variable amount of points, determined by the hosting organisation.

 

Article X3: If rain is predicted for the time of the event one week in advance of the event, then the event shall be cancelled, unless the hosting organisation pays additional fees.

[ElJefe]

Article 79.1
The starting grid order will be determined in a lottery. The person who conducts the draw will be determined via an open auction. If the winning bid to conduct the lottery exceeds 5 million dollar, the person is allowed to pick one driver of his preference to start on pole position, whereas the other positions will be determined in a lottery conducted by said bidder.

[Rob]

Only rule changes submitted under the influence shall be adopted.

[HuddersfieldTerrier1986]

Article 14.1

 

The winning driver must perform donuts at the end of the race. Failure to do so will result in the race winner being made to drive the next race with a donut shaped helmet.

[JRizzle86]

Article 21.3 Section C

 

All drivers must keep to the signed speed limit at that part of the track or they will receive a penalty notice either requiring a 100 point deduction or a big slap on the bottom. 

[thegforcemaybewithyou]

Article 0: The second law of Formula 1 states that the stupidity of F1's technical and sporting regulations shall never decrease. As F1 is an isolated racing series(formerly known as the pinnacle of motorsports), the stupidity of the rules will reach infinity within the next championchip seasons. Once the state of racing equilibrium is reached, the official name of the racing series will be changed to F0. This process is not reversible and has already started with the introduction of the PZero tyre!

 

 

Quote of the day: "Two things are infinite, the universe and the stupidity of the F1 regulations. And i'm not sure about the universe!", unkown F1 fan

Edited by thegforcemaybewithyou, 09 December 2013 - 22:01.

[apoka]

In order to spice up racing cars with even numbers race clockwise and cars with odd numbers race counterclockwise.

[Afterburner]

An oldie but a goodie: bring back H-pattern gearboxes, and before each race secretly swap out a random gear in each car with reverse.

What, you wanted a show, right?

[scheivlak]

All drivers with more than 25 points go to jail. 

They get an "out of jail" card if another driver lands on the same number of points.

[Ian G]

Bernie allowed by the FIA to run F-1 as his personal Chiefdom....

[Red17]

You people are making it too complex. Just add the following rules:

 

- Any yellow flag brings the race into safety car mode

- Any person carrying an accreditation pass can call a yellow flag on safety grounds

 

Bonus rules:

- Mr. B. Ecclestone may award any driver on the championship equal or more points than the points leader prior to the last race.

- Extra points earned in the final race may be converted into Dinner Tickets, to be spent before December 31st of the same year the lastest.

[BenettonB192]

For the first 15 races of the season drivers are awarded with medals and teams are awarded with points. For the other 15 races this system is reversed.

Points earned by the drivers in the second half are then multiplied by the the medal earned in the corresponding race of the first half season (for example 16th race with 1st race, 30th race with 15th race). The multiplication factors are 0.25 for bronze, 0.98 for silver and 0.75 for gold. Exceptions are made when a driver earned three bronze medals in a row (2 bonus points) or gold, silver, bronze in succession in combination with at least one pole position and two fastest laps (3.75 bonus points).

 

There are no multiplication factors for the constructors championship instead medals and points will be added phonetically. Winner of the constructors world championship will be whose tally creates the longest sound.

[noikeee]

Button that drops a puddle of oil onto the track for the following car.

 

Turbo arrows on the ground that speed up the car.

 

Flying mushrooms that give you extra downforce if you manage to grab them.

 

Shortcuts but they're soaked in water and you can only take them if you're with slick tyres.

 

Shortcuts on dirt tracks.

 

Electromagnetic pulse gun to kill the KERS on an opponent's car, you can only take 1 shot per race.

[Brother Fox]

Points awarded for the race are not known until the podium ceremony where the winner draws balls from a barrel.

 

Qualifying to be scrapped with drivers starting in alphabetical order (part of the 'we cant let him win a 5th' package adopted in lieu of other teams improving)

[noikeee]

Qualifying to be scrapped with drivers starting in alphabetical order (part of the 'we cant let him win a 5th' package adopted in lieu of other teams improving)

 

Yes but what kind of alphabetical order is unknown. For Monaco GP, the alphabet starts with a Z. For Spain, it starts with an F. They shall draw balls from a barrel blindfolded whilst upside down for this one, too.

[Ryan94]

Yes but what kind of alphabetical order is unknown. For Monaco GP, the alphabet starts with a Z. For Spain, it starts with an F. They shall draw balls from a barrel blindfolded whilst upside down for this one, too.

 

Even then a certain German wouldn't be on pole, cos even if V drawn then he'll still be behind Vergne

[Disgrace]

Article 5319009.

 

All stewards must ingest 0.25g of magic mushrooms for every penalty they hand out during the race. 

[Ali_G]

Chequered flag to be waved by Bruce Forsyth and Jan Michael Vincent on alternate race weekends.

 

Each pit crew to get a 1KG ration of salt for the year

Edited by Ali_G, 10 December 2013 - 01:24.

[tomspar]

Damn, I posted this on the wrong thread, nobody took me seriously.

 

http://forums.autosp...of-2014-season/

 

This is such a refreshing idea. The end has to be more important! Ain't y'all heard of the SUPER BOWL?

 

Still, Bernie is not thinking out of the box. Add a hyperturbo button, should be easy with the turbo motor. Fans vote LIVE during the race to add power to the button. A modest fee of only $1 will add an entire Joule of power to the button; MC/VISA they take AMEX black too! Comp the VIPs with megajoule votes - they deserve it!

 

Better yet, the voting is SECRET, and Bernie adds the Joules to whoever he wants to win! No doubt he would script an awesome finish. CVC splits the new revenue stream with Bernie, and they are happy for another year! C'mon that's eternity in the history of F1!!!

 

Here I feel I am among friends. So many great ideas here. Great minds think alike! (Except Disgrace, you surely meant 0.25 stone! Quit showing off your fancy French unit(s))

[Reinmuster]

Any driver who leads the race by more than 25 seconds will be allowed to make an additional pit stop. Be it to take a leak, or tea time with Bernie. Whatever.

 

This will promote even closer racing.

[Velocifer]

Article 111.1

All new regulations must have the intended effect of adding "spice" to the show, and increasing TV rating.

Of course, that's the only way forward for F1 and what the fans want..

 

[Glengavel]

Gordon Spice to come out of retirement to set up a team of cars driven by the Spice Girls and sponsored by Old Spice aftershave.

 

Grid position to be decided by greased pig wrestling (except for Saudi Arabia).

 

If you get a puncture you must fit a space-saver wheel and tyre.

[Jackmancer]

Female drivers to get an extra point for finishing the race, with cupsize being a multiplier of points.

[noikeee]

Even then a certain German wouldn't be on pole, cos even if V drawn then he'll still be behind Vergne

 

Well that's perfect then!

[GoodSister]

The calendar to be decided by the throwing of darts before the start of the season. Races to be selected alphabetically, then just throw the dart and see where it lands on the board, so if the dart for Australia hits 6, that will be the 6th race of the season. No race can take place at the same time, so as many attempts can be made until 1-20 have been hit once. Should bulls-eye be hit during the process, everyone's points total will go back to zero in time for that race.

[jhmcgregor]

Whenever a race gets boring, new Safety Car driver Dick Dastardly will drive onto the track and mark a diversion route through the gravel traps.

[Atic Atac]

Article 13.37

 

"In order to Spice the show, all entrants will mandatorely use, during the duration of the event, at least two of these ingredients:

 

- Black Pepper

- Chili Powder

- Ginger

- Curry

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Nonesuch]

You people are making it too complex. Just add the following rules:

 

- Any yellow flag brings the race into safety car mode

- Any person carrying an accreditation pass can call a yellow flag on safety grounds

 

May I propose:

 

- In addition to allowing lapped cars to overtake, every safety car situation will now require the running order to be reversed.

 

In order to promote the animosity between drivers, which will lead to more drama and thus a better show, I also suggest F1 adopts the following rules:

 

- If Sebastian Vettel takes pole without hitting all the apexes, Lewis Hamilton gets a 5 place grid penalty.

- If Fernando Alonso is outqualified by his teammate, Sebastian Vettel gets the 'it's the car'-penalty, forcing the German to start from he pitlane.

- If Daniel Ricciardo finishes behind Jean-Éric Vergne they will have to swap cars for the next three events.

- If Jenson Button sets the fastest lap on intermediate tyres, Kimi Räikkönen will get a drive-through penalty.

- If Nico Hülkenberg finishes in front of a Lotus, PDVSA will be required to pay him a $1.000.000 bonus.

[Jamiednm]

Buxom two-piece bikini and high heel-clad pit girls to run on and off the track at random intervals, giggling and getting caught in two minds about what to do next. Any driver that hits a girl with his car will be black flagged and banned from the next race.

[AvranaKern]

Two 5-minute long mandatory pit-stops shall be introduced for mandatory commercial breaks. During pit-stops, no work shall be done on car and driver.

[sosidge]

How about...

 

Cars are built to a set of "rules" based on building the fastest race car within said "rules". The cars have a "steering wheel" to control direction of travel and "foot pedals" to control how fast or slow the vehicle travels. 

 

On Saturday, cars run in a "qualifying session" and get allocated a "grid position" based on their fastest lap time.

 

On Sunday, cars then start from this "grid" and race for 300km (or 2 hours) to decide the "winner". Points are allocated based on finishing position.

 

Annual championships are awarded to the driver and the constructor with the most "points".

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Nahhhh.... too crazy.... 

[Lone]

Make it a triathlon, driving, bicycling and ending with running a marathon. That way the car won't be all that important.

[DampMongoose]

All teams must paint their cars brown and the engines must be designed so as to emit a strong smell of excrement, each time a car activates the DRS it must leave a festering dollop of **** on the track.  Also Abu Dhabi will have unlimited DRS zones so the track can be covered entirely in **** by the end of the 3rd lap.  With these new rules applied, the series will accurately convey my feelings for it at present.

[R Soul]

Article 802.11(g): All cars must have access to wireless internet so that fans can use twitter to send encouraging messages directly to their favourite driver during the race. Messages will appear on a HUD projected onto the driver's visor.

[Rinehart]

Well the holy grail would be to have a more bonkers set of rules than Formula E. 

Cars that don't last a race. Text to boost... 

 

There seems to be a huge contradiction in the marketing platform of F1 relative to the entertainment; it seeks to promote complex technologies and sophisticated brands, clearly not consumed by idiots, whilst the actual show is being shaped in a way that assumes we are a bunch of popcorn munching couch potatoes...

[Zava]

Even then a certain German wouldn't be on pole, cos even if V drawn then he'll still be behind Vergne

easy fix - toro drops Vergne for da Costa. 

[DrivenF1]

All drivers vote their ideal grid before the race. The grid is then ordered by average voted position.

 

To add an extra element of fun - you can nominate one driver and if they put you further down the grid than you've put them, they get sent to the back of the grid. If it's a tie both of you go to the back of the grid.

[DrivenF1]

easy fix - toro drops Vergne for da Costa. 

 

Or Toro Rosso/Red Bull programme re-employ Albuquerque and Alguersuari. Or get their two drivers to legally change their names to A and AA.

Edited by Cult, 10 December 2013 - 13:14.

[wrighty]

How about...

 

Cars are built to a set of "rules" based on building the fastest race car within said "rules". The cars have a "steering wheel" to control direction of travel and "foot pedals" to control how fast or slow the vehicle travels. 

 

On Saturday, cars run in a "qualifying session" and get allocated a "grid position" based on their fastest lap time.

 

On Sunday, cars then start from this "grid" and race for 300km (or 2 hours) to decide the "winner". Points are allocated based on finishing position.

 

Annual championships are awarded to the driver and the constructor with the most "points".

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Nahhhh.... too crazy.... 

 

you forgot 'teams should be allowed to change the setup on their 'cars' between all sessions during the race weekend' - that'd **** em right up, they'd have too much choice.

[Kristian]

Abu Dhabi to be double points but make it a 24hr race - with no driver changes allowed. 

 

F1 calendar to go all-year round with a 4-week Christmas Break. The season opener will be Montreal in January. 

 

The final Sauber seat will be decided by an X-Factor esque Cowell show, with the drive based purely on singing talent and sob story. 

 

The top 3 qualifiers will have to do a 'podium' 10 mins before the race, finishing ALL their champagne. 

Edited by Kristian, 10 December 2013 - 13:18.