Well of course two wrongs don't make a right, and I agree it is stupid to assert that one wrong gives a credit for a future infraction from a wronged competitor. However, what I am saying is that nobody wished to see the ruination of what was a great battle. Alonso and Vettel fought long and hard, with Alonso claiming victory after victory and in the end, Vettel claimed the final victory and took off. It was a classic and it would make a sham of it for Whiting to have rung up Vettel and told him to get off the gas so Alonso could catch him up and pass him (with Mags on his tail) and they should restart the racing bit without either driver going wide and no chopping from Alonso. That'd be a brilliant way to deflate what had been an intense span of excitement for fans. Too many unanswered questions in the moment for it to be anything else.
I know you don't think Alonso did anything wrong enough to be penalized for, but that is also true with respect to going wide. Alonso did go wide a number of times earlier - and forget the impact aspect - think about the penalty. Repeated violations merely merited a black and white flag warning. Granted, that is a hefty warning. But I think it showed that the stewards were clearly not disposed to handing out tough penalties for that particular infraction. I consider that the stewards, one of whom is a driver's racer, may not have agreed with Charlie on the sinfullness of going wide - hence the lack of penalties on that front throughout the race. So applying this to the matter at hand: when both drivers were going off and Alonso was overdoing it with the defending, and Vettel went wide to good effect - perhaps they were still simply not disposed to handing out tough penalties for those things, and in addition, they were not disposed to ruining what was clearly a classic battle. So in a nutshell, my take on it is that the stewards were not disposed to handing out tough, game changing, penalties during that battle.
Well firstly it's got nothing to do with the stewards because, if you look on the FIA website, you'll see that the stewards only made six decisions last Sunday and none of them concerned track limits, which tells you that Whiting never referred any track limits violations to them for consideration and that's why there were no penalties. Had the stewards been asked to consider these matters there would have been a message on live timing and on television to say they were under investigation, and a written decision would have been published even if the decision was "no further action". The black & white flag comes from the Race Director, not the stewards.
Secondly I think you've correctly identified the factor that led Whiting to let this one go, and led most of the pundits and fans to agree with him, which is a kind of a vague feeling that an on-track battle of that quality shouldn't be interfered with. As well as following motor racing I'm also a football fan and I can tell you, if you suggested to a football fan, even if that fan was neutral with respect to the game being played, that a late winning goal should be allowed to stand even though the goalscorer was a couple of yards offside because it had been such a good game, and we wouldn't want the officials to get involved unnecessarily, you'd get a pretty funny look. Maybe I'm bringing that mentality to bear on this situation, but unltimately rules are rules, and the rule in this case is clear, and I'm not persuaded that we should forget about the rules for the sake of the show.
And thirdly, if by now you still either don't grasp or don't agree with the notion that the rules explicitly state that running wide and gaining nothing and running wide and gaining a position are to be treated completely differently, and therefore the argument that there were transgressions on both sides simply doesn't hold up, then I don't think we're going to be able to agree on this, so for my part I'm happy to let it rest. It's all water under the bridge now anyway, although as I've mentioned, the next time somebody is told to hand a position back because of track limits, don't be surprised if this case is raised by way of comparison.