By an overwhelming consensus of three, we have decided that the IndyCar finale thread will be an assemblage of the collective wisdom/humor/blathering/drone/facts/etc. of this board.
MAVTV 500 RACE WEEKEND SCHEDULE
Friday, August 29
8:30 a.m. Parking Lots Open
9:30 a.m. Infield Viewing Areas Open to Ticket Holders*
10:00 a.m. - 11:15 a.m. Verizon IndyCar Series Practice
2:15 p.m. - 3:30 p.m. Verizon IndyCar Series Qualifying
3:45 p.m. - 4:05 p.m. Victory Lane Historic Champ/IndyCar Showcase
5:30 p.m. - 5:50 p.m. Victory Lane Historic Champ/IndyCar Showcase
6:15 p.m. - 6:45 p.m. Verizon IndyCar Series Practice
Saturday, August 30
12:00 p.m. Parking Lots Open
3:15 p.m. Lefty’s Track Laps (Advanced ticket required)**
4:00 p.m. O’Reilly Fan Zone Gates Open to Ticket Holders*
In case you failed to notice, Indycar has been quietly calling your name for the past few months. I say quietly because, if this is your first time here, despite putting on more good races than you could shake a stick at (you could do that anyway, but it'd look pretty stupid), you still haven't noticed what has possibly been the best racing season this year. Elsewhere in the racing world, we've had a young Spainiard rewriting history books, the second coming of a legendary racing marque, and a three-way manufacturer fight on the cutting edge of hybrid technology.
Bearing all that in mind, why the hell would you even bother with a single-make, two-engine spec-series?
Because Indycar. Yes, Indycar. I can't really say it another way. Indycar is the series that actually pulls off ridiculous rules like double-points races, passing aids, and tyre compound restrictions--and looks better because of it. Indycar is the series in which interviews are meant to be on cable TV. Indycar is the series in which paradoxical results occur on an irregular basis so unusual that it would drive even the proudest statisticians to run up and down the streets of their respective campus yelling indiscriminately at inanimate objects (it thus goes without saying that no-one is a sure bet for the championship). Indycar is the answer to the every disgruntled racing strategist's startled cry of 'how?' after a race goes upside-down. Indycar is the series whose championships are affected by lunar eclipses and earthquakes. Indycar is the series in which screwing up in reverse is actually possible and happens on a regular basis. Indycar is the series in which drivers embrace rather than disprove their respective stereotypes, race-in, race-out. Indycar is the series in which miracles do happen... unless your name is Will Power, anyway.
It's also the series that's ending in August. This weekend, right now. The first major racing series to bite the dust of winter and say farewell to the three of us who're still watching before the collective head of the masses turns its attention to AMERICAN FOOTBALL. Short, but so incredibly sweet. We've seen it all this year: rookie winners, teammate collisions, pace-car spins, completely improbable wins (and losses), sterling examples of defensive and offensive driving, and enough boneheaded moves to make Pastor Maldonado jealous--for many of which our part-time racing god, full-time airbrain Will Power is responsible. He's hit so many people and copped so many penalties at such an astonishing rate this year that one must imagine he'll soon be travelling into the future to collect penalties that haven't yet been issued for collisions with drivers who aren't yet racing. You laugh--but I should remind you this is Indycar we're talking about, after all.
Will Power showing the opposition what he thinks of them. Trust me, this is the tame version.
So we're already at the end of the season. Here's a recap of all the races this year so set the scene.
St. Petersburg
Yes comrades, the season started at that now traditional Spring Break (WOOOO!) race in the flattest state in the US. To get us in the mood for the airport/street circuit, Indycar debuted a fantastic new feature, the VisorCam...
...and promptly decided it was too awsome for us and stopped it.
Will Power decided to show us what this year would be all about by winning easily and causing chaos along the way.
But it did introduce us to Nigel Mansell Jack Hawksworth and the Americans learned a new word, "concertina".
Long Beach
It's not a beach, and it's not particularly long, but it is the race of the year outside that one in Indiana.
Mike Conway showed us what he could do by winning again, and we were all disappointed that he doesn't do the full season. But he only inherited the lead after mucho shenanigans, including Noobgarden and RHR creating a magnificent pileup.
The Power factor came when Will, caught out by Simon Pagenaud's stealthly abilities, took a corner as if the Frenchman was not there, and got away with it.
Alabama
It looked like Power would return to the winner's circle at Barber, but it started to rain and Will just slid off, given Hunter-Reay a win and hopes that he might be a championship contender.
Juan Pablo Montoya was getting back into the swing of things, making some incredible moves...
...and then spinning out.
Indy Grand Prix
Indycar chose to race on the Indianapolis road course, because to hell with tradition. Saavedra got pole, and no further.
After the horrendous start, Hawksworth made a name for himself by leading a good chunk of the race. But nobody told him that that means nothing in Indycar, and Pagenaud took a stealthy win, getting us all excited about his championship prospects.
Indy 500
The real thing, with double points this year. RHR took the win in a tremendously exciting finish from Helio. But we didn't get to see it properly because of WAG-Cam.
We also had Kurt Busch doing a bit of double duty from his usual tin-top frolics, and did a fine job too. Jock Villenoo also made a comeback, but wasn't as spectacular.
Detroit Double
We had two races on the Belle Isle circuit, and it was a Penske benefit. Championship rivals Helio and Will swapped wins. SATOOO was on pole for race 2, but Power still managed to barge his way through, leaving all sorts of chaos in his wake.
Texas
Ed Carpenter's team must wish they could merge their two drivers, because each is a front runner on their favourite circuit type. Special Ed took the win on the high banks of Texas. Power was doing well, but managed to speed in the pitlane.
Sebastian Bourdais was the troublemaker this race, but his time would come.
(Video in Russian for cultural diversity)
Houston
Someone decided that Houston in June was a good idea, but it ended up raining anyway. It was such an eventful weekend I'll just show you the official highlights, but it includes Sato being taken out by a god-damn idiot, and Graham Rahal going full retard.
Somehow, Carlos Huertas won the first race, while Pagenaud took his second win, but this time making sure we all noticed.
Pocono
This double points race was a JPM benefit. The Colombian hero triumphed after Penske showed us how teammate contact should be done.
Iowa
Iowa was looking like Tony Kanaan's race, but he, like many others, couldn't work out how Indycar strategy works. RHR took his third win of the season with a storming last few laps.
We also saw Aleshin/Sato round two, and Ed Carpenter apparently chose to try the low line on the event of Montoya just happening to be there.
Toronto
I could never adequately summarise the chaos and confusion of Toronto.
The pace car spun off for crying out loud, with Arie Luyendyk at the wheel and all.
Drama, action, excitement, the good times and the bad times. Both races were held on Sunday to find some good conditions, not that it helped.
Seabass finally got his win, and I think he remembered not to drop his trophy this time. Conway won again in the afternoon, cementing his role as road course specialist.
Mid-Ohio
After caution free races in the recent past, Tony Kanaan decided to put things right at the start of the Mid-Ohio race.
Scott Dixon's team finally figured out how to win on an Indycar road course. The rituals involved are still top secret, but Afterburner up there has some hints as to what it could be. The Ganassi strategists managed to get their Kiwi champion out into the lead when it mattered, the last stint of the race.
Milwaukee
I missed this race, but somehow Will Power took this third win of the year. Power seems to have got the ovals sorted out, which is good for Fontana, because his California run didn't start off very well.
Sears Point/Sonoma/Infineon/The Brown Track
Now we're up to date. If you've already forgotten what happened on Sunday (I know you've been drinking a lot recently. Do you need help with that?) we saw Power have a classic race. Leading and looking for his first championship, and then everything went to pot. Spins, contact, the usual. It was left for Dixon to grab another win, after being able to save enough fuel, which neither Conway or Rahal could do. Meanwhile Helio also had a pretty tough day, so we're left with a championship decided in Fontana.
So there you have it. It has been a remarkable season so far. 10 drivers have won races, which is only 1 short of the record from the 2000/2001 CART seasons. Honda and Chevy have not been as close as last year, with 6 wins for the Japanese and 11 for the American engines.
Who will win the championship? Well Power has his best chance yet, but this is Indycar, and anything can happen.
Indycar Series is an anagram of Racy Sin Desire. Sums it all up I think.
Ah well, if we're talking anagrams, I'm surprised nobody noticed that Simon Pagenaud is 'An amusing dope.' Fellow Frenchman Seabass turns out to be a 'Dinosaur bias beast.'
Of course a short name like 'Will Power' doesn't offer that many choices. But his full name is William Steven Power. Which produces the delightful image of 'A Slovenlier Wet Wimp' who occasionally emits a 'Slower Plaintive Mew'.
Indycars must not finish in August, it's criminal to go from very late March to late August and not expect people to forget about it come the next March...
Every year Indycar seems to push start of Fontana 1 hour forward. 2 years ago it started 2 AM CET, last year 3AM CET, now 4AM? I have no idea if I will be able to wake up for it (because staying up so long without partying is impossible, and partying means crashing @6-7AM, way too early before the end of the race).
Indycars must not finish in August, it's criminal to go from very late March to late August and not expect people to forget about it come the next March...
To be fair, even Nascar takes a big hit in viewership after August coinciding with the NFL season. Indycar ratings are up this year when compared like-for-like vs 2013. There may be some more improvement following Nascar moving over to NBC and NBCSN, since more people will be tuning into the latter in general vs this year. Hard to say whether network or cable is a better bet at this point.
St. Petersburg Yes comrades, the season started at that now traditional Spring Break (WOOOO!) race in the flattest state in the US. To get us in the mood for the airport/street circuit, Indycar debuted a fantastic new feature, the VisorCam...
Please tell me this is a reference to Arrested Development. Come to think of it, a 'year in retrospect' video with music from the show and Ron Howard's narration would be pretty funny...
Celebration athems to be aproved by Jp:
Helio
I don't really connect this to HCN, but you get 450 billion awesome points for putting this song (any Pink Floyd, for that matter) in an Indycar thread. Now all we need is for Karen Gillan to make an appearance and then I'll be able to call this thread my new home.
I don't really connect this to HCN, but you get 450 billion awesome points for putting this song (any Pink Floyd, for that matter) in an Indycar thread. Now all we need is for Karen Gillan to make an appearance and then I'll be able to call this thread my new home.
Blast, I'm at work now. Anyone care to post at least one picture of Amy Pond?
Please tell me this is a reference to Arrested Development. Come to think of it, a 'year in retrospect' video with music from the show and Ron Howard's narration would be pretty funny...
I don't really connect this to HCN, but you get 450 billion awesome points for putting this song (any Pink Floyd, for that matter) in an Indycar thread. Now all we need is for Karen Gillan to make an appearance and then I'll be able to call this thread my new home.
I think I got it from generic American media, which probably means Friends, because they did everything.
So this was happening yesterday, the Penske boys having blender races. I think helio the slick won. Maybe this is a prelude to them mixing it up on Saturday?
After all the outstanding posts, get ready for some suckitude. I also wanted to finish this before the parking lot opened, but alas...
Ok, history time...
First, some history on the city of Fontana.
Fun fact number one, the speedway isn't actually in the city limits.
Fun fact number two, Fontana was founded in 1913 by Azariel Blanchard Miller (now you know why he was known as A.B.)
Fun fact number three, there is no fun fact number three.
Mention Fontana, even to some of our overseas members and this is what comes to mind:
(insert stereotypical hillbilly image or imagine it. Use your imagination, you're an Indycar fan)
Very unfair. In short, Fontana (and the entire "Inland Empire") has become L.A.'s New Jersey. You know, we show how cosmopolitan we are by making fun of outlying communities and say things like: "I never go East of (insert freeway)."
But, faced with spending time with a stereotypical "Fontuckian" or some Silver Lake hipster who won't STFU about his homemade artisanal jam, the Meyer lemon tree he planted in the backyard of his bungalow and the latest indie-band-of-the-moment, who would you choose? For me the choice is easy.
Now, let's see what Wikipedia has to say about famous Fontanans. Hmm, a lot of mid-level MLB players, several people who (typically for Wikipedia) either briefly lived there and moved away or (even more typically for Wikipedia) might not have lived there at all, but wait!...
Ok, that's somewhat awesome. Sammy was Grand Marshall for the 2013 Fontana Days parade and 100th Anniversary celebration. He also had a street in Fontana named in his honor. He's even played a pre-race concert at the speedway (cool!). If you want to check out some underrated, overlooked rock & roll, look into Sammy Hagar's first two LPs. What else can I tell you about Sammy Hagar? Well, he was in a couple of other bands and I understand he can't drive 55.
Fontana was at one time pretty much nothing but orange groves. Then Henry J. Kaiser decided it would be a great place for a steel mill to help with his shipbuilding. The orange groves hung in there for another 30-40 years before "affordable" housing for commuters began swallowing up the area tract by tract. Oh, and the Kaiser Steel Mill emitted a lot of smoke that became a thick smog.
Fun fact number four, Henry J. Kaiser once built cars, including one called the Henry J.
Fun fact number five, the school nickname at Fontana High is the Steelers. High school football was a big deal in Fontana, a very big deal.
Fun fact number six, nearby is the site of the Fontana Drag Strip, which was at one time a pretty bitchin' cool place to watch guys like Danny Ongais, The Surfers and many other drag racing legends burn up the quarter mile.
What does this have to do with Indycar? Well, when the economy took a down turn, the Kaiser Mill closed. With contaminated soil, there wasn't a lot to do with the property. Until one Mr. Penske had talks, cleaned up the site and built California Speedway. The first race was in 1997...
Look for part two, California/Auto Club Speedway history (or if someone wants to, please, please feel free to do so!). I am not good at the YouTubey linkys.
Seems like I'm forgetting something. Oh, that's right, memes. Conveniently downsized, due to the economy and to signify the final race of the season...or excuse of your choice.
Jim - Can you clean out your PMs please? I would like to meet at the race tomorrow if you would like. Thanks!
Great history lesson, I did not know that Fontana and famous could be used positively in the same sentence.
Paul, oh...that's what I needed to do I'd love to meet up at the race, but...sadly, I won't be there. I know, I know, I'm a heretic.
If I could find a nearby wi-fi hotspot, I'd take my laptop and sit outside in a lawn chair in the heat to try to replicate the atmosphere. Better yet if I could pull that off alongside the highway
Famous and Fontana in the same sentence Well, aside from my highlighted person, it's pretty much lesser known MLB and NBA players, so the jury still weighs in your favor.
Now the bad news..
Jp is mid-gig in East Nowheresville New Hampshire during the race so I have set all 3 DVR's on the tour bus for viewing at around 10:45 pm EDT when the show comes down. So failing to have any thrilling interaction with the genera on the thread during the last race of what's been a fun and frenetic year......
So far this has been a brilliant culmination to the season that was. However, I do feel there has been a significant ommission to the list of anthems!
Surely the bobsy twins of Graham Rahal and Marco Andretti are worthy of consideration? After all, together they may be able to scrape together a functioning brain cell that they can successfully share in a way that does not leave them both going full time, full ******, all the time. Okay, maybe not, but at least they jointly deserve an anthem and as such, I put forward this for His Holiness the Pollak's blessing:
This thread is superb. It's getting me excited about the race. I'm almost tempted to watch it live.......but I have things to do the next day so.
But to continue the Amy pond theme
To Indycar 2014. It's been fun.
I have question though. What are the superb indycar posters going to post in now?
Formula E perhaps?
I have question though. What are the superb indycar posters going to post in now?
Formula E perhaps?
I'm going to spend my time on Youtube videos of old CART races writing comments about how lucky we are that Tony George came along and saved racing in America. And then for variety's sake go on some Youtube videos of IRL races from 1997 and comment how Indycar has betrayed its roots.
I for one seriously used to look on IndyCar and laugh at it in comparison to the wonders of the mighty Formula 1. However, I really should have actually watched a race before I made that rather hasty judgement and honestly, I absolutely love it!
As is seemingly quite common though, I find it quite difficult to accurately say why...
Indycars must not finish in August, it's criminal to go from very late March to late August and not expect people to forget about it come the next March...
Even the cricket season lasts longer than that. Too few races, too little interest, not enough inter-manufacturer competition; and only shown on BT in the UK - Who they?