85 replies to this topic

[kevinracefan]

this is one of the funniest, most cockamamie stories ever..

http://www.foxsports...hort_code=2uojs

[Atreiu]

Did Alesi ever get a crashing nickname?

 

edit: Spinalesi would have worked.

Edited by Atreiu, 23 April 2015 - 15:47.

[kosmos]

 

"To find the limit, you need to cross the limit. I think I have the big balls to cross the limit every time."

 

 

Pastor, the points are on the other side of the line, so maybe you should not cross it the next time.

[Grundle]

Perma-deluded is Pastor.

[johnmhinds]

Sure...

 

Takes some big ball to stop in the wrong grid spot...

 

Takes some big balls to turn off your own engine in the pitlane...

[Andrew Hope]

Sure...

 

Takes some big ball to stop in the wrong grid spot...

 

Takes some big balls to turn off your own engine in the pitlane...

 

Well, it does take some big balls to wear braces when you're nearly 30.

[Diablobb81]

That explains his small brain?

[Jimisgod]

He's crashed more recently than Australia hasn't he?

[Dan333SP]

I think "Crashtor" is unfair as well. The nickname implies that he's just known for his crashing. That's not true. He ruins his own races and those of other drivers in ways that extend far beyond simple crashes. We don't consider it a crash when he repeatedly goes into the gravel trap while trying to navigate pit lane entries, or when he shuts off his engine in pit lane, or lines up incorrectly, or rams someone's rear end and damages their undertray without actually punting them, or forces a team to balance the amount of cash he brings in against the amount of physical damage and lost prize money he inflicts by throwing away opportunities in top 10 cars. His nickname should reflect the multifaceted brilliance that goes into finding new ways to allow Lotus to spend as if they're a 2 car team but effectively race as a single car team.

[johnmhinds]

I think "Crashtor" is unfair as well. The nickname implies that he's just known for his crashing. That's not true. He ruins his own races and those of other drivers in ways that extend far beyond simple crashes. We don't consider it a crash when he repeatedly goes into the gravel trap while trying to navigate pit lane entries, or when he shuts off his engine in pit lane, or lines up incorrectly, or rams someone's rear end and damages their undertray without actually punting them, or forces a team to balance the amount of cash he brings in against the amount of physical damage and lost prize money he inflicts by throwing away opportunities in top 10 cars. His nickname should reflect the multifaceted brilliance that goes into finding new ways to allow Lotus to spend as if they're a 2 car team but effectively race as a single car team.

 

Maybe "Smashtor" would work better. 

[Dan333SP]

Cashtor Faildonado sums him up nicely.

[ensign14]

I find it interesting that the Chinese characters to transliterate Renault - "lei nuo" - translate to "promise of thunder".

 

And, hey presto, Maldonado brings the foretold big bang.

 

What McDonalds does not understand is that when it comes to tightrope walking, we might admire the bravery of someone who falls off it, but we prefer the skill of someone who does not.

[Atreiu]

Seriously, have you guys ever googled Alesi + Crash ?

 

You can't help but laugh after a while.

[ANF]

Seriously, have you guys ever googled Alesi + Crash ?

 

You can't help but laugh after a while.

Hopeless!

[travbrad]

this is one of the funniest, most cockamamie stories ever..

http://www.foxsports...hort_code=2uojs

 

From FOX?  Normally they are such a bastion of accuracy and truth in the news world.  

 

His balls are definitely big though.  Unfortunately they are so big that they are taking up valuable space inside his skull.  He should really have that looked at.

[emmanuelrubi]

Wonder how long it will take the admin to close this topic since it looks like its gonna end in a bash against pastor which is already done in like 3 other topics.

[Man of the race]

Takes some big ball to stop in the wrong grid spot...

Well, driving positions are quite horizontal. Probably he couldn't see properly where to stop.

[Dan333SP]

Wonder how long it will take the admin to close this topic since it looks like its gonna end in a bash against pastor which is already done in like 3 other topics.

 

Reported as Mod Baiting.

 

Q: How many threads does it take to properly bash Pastor?

 

A: As many as required until we too are being paid millions and millions of dollars to drive racing cars in exotic locations.

Edited by Dan333SP, 23 April 2015 - 19:37.

[KWSN - DSM]

Maldonado is a Grand Prix winner, his race-craft is wanting and questionable but he did have his day of days in Spain, without looking how many times have he crashed out of a race? Then look it up and see how relatively few it actually is. He is not my cup of tea, but a championship wining driver, winning races at the highest level. Ultimate talent much better than a lot of other F1 drivers through history.

 

[johnmhinds]

Maldanado theme song:

 

[johnmhinds]

Maldonado is a Grand Prix winner, his race-craft is wanting and questionable but he did have his day of days in Spain, without looking how many times have he crashed out of a race? Then look it up and see how relatively few it actually is. He is not my cup of tea, but a championship wining driver, winning races at the highest level. Ultimate talent much better than a lot of other F1 drivers through history.

 

 

 

You'd struggle to find a driver with a worse record than Maldonado who still got to keep his drive after 4 years, he can't hang his whole career on that one win.

Edited by johnmhinds, 23 April 2015 - 20:07.

[KWSN - DSM]

 

You'd struggle to find a driver with a worse record than Maldonado who still got to keep his drive after 4 years, he can't hang his whole career on that one win.

 

Not finishing is not the same as crashing, he have actually crashed /been accidented a lot less than I thought I wold find. I agree his career statistics are woeful, however he is still both a Championship winner, and a Grand Prix winner, looking his career before F1, no matter how you fold it he is a driver who SHOULD get a F1 chance, he is a driver who so far have won as many races as Alesi ever did in F1.

 

2003 F. Renault 2.0 multiple race wins Champion
2004 F. Renault 2.0 multiple race wins Champion
2005 F3000 Italy Race winner
2006 WS Renault multiple race winner
2007 GP2 Race winner
2008 GP2 Race winner, 6 podiums
2008 Euro 3000 1 race, won that race
2009 GP2 Multiple race winner
2009 Euro 3000 2 races 1 win
2010 GP2 Multiple (6) race wins, Champion

 

Maldona have retired from about 1/3rd of the Grand Prix's he have been entered in, if you want to look at another 'crasher' De Cesaris retired from a staggering 70% of the Grand Prix's he was entered in. Alesi retired from 43% of his Grand Prix's. Grosjean the team mate have retired from 32% of his Grand Prix's.

 

Perception is many things, my presumption is Maldonado's less than sunny disposition is a big part of the dislike. Having said that, I am NOT a fan of his, I simply do not think he is as bad as he is being made out to be. And then lastly, I think he can be replaced by a number of deserving drivers in lower formulas, we know what we are getting from him, he will never be World Drivers Champion, so try someone else.

 

[BullHead]

Maldonado is a good racer imo, yeah not F1 material. Nor should he be given his early F1 attitude, the spa incident springing to mind

[ardbeg]

Not finishing is not the same as crashing, he have actually crashed /been accidented a lot less than I thought I wold find

 

 

Well, crashing is not necessarily the same as not finishing either. New front wing and go.

[MikeTekRacing]

both Alesi and Pastor have 1 wins each

Pastor actually still has the chance to change that

[ninetyzero]

No he's awful. His balls might be big but his brain is tiny.

[Afterburner]

Hey, give him a break: as of this post, he hasn't crashed in 39 days, 16 hours, 16 minutes and 30 seconds.

Edited by Afterburner, 23 April 2015 - 21:20.

[johnmhinds]

 

 

Maldona have retired from about 1/3rd of the Grand Prix's he have been entered in, if you want to look at another 'crasher' De Cesaris retired from a staggering 70% of the Grand Prix's he was entered in. Alesi retired from 43% of his Grand Prix's. Grosjean the team mate have retired from 32% of his Grand Prix's.

 

 

 

I wasn't really looking at Maldonado's retirements in that chart, even in the races he has finished he has failed to look impressive.

 

And you think he is better than de Cesaris, Alesi and Grosjean? High praise indeed! 

And all those drivers had/have better race to podium rates than Maldonado has so far, despite their many retirements.

 

I don't know how he is still getting his backers to pay for his drive at this point to be honest.

There has to be a better driver from Venezuela that they can get behind.

[Les]

 

You'd struggle to find a driver with a worse record than Maldonado who still got to keep his drive after 4 years, he can't hang his whole career on that one win.

 

Seriously how the hell did he manage to win a race? It still doesn't make sense. Maybe another guy came along disguised as Maldonado? His record otherwise is shocking. Only one other old-school top 6 finish. 

[REDalert]

I kind of hope that Maldonado finds some race craft and start performing at level of his best 2012 days. Grosjean has done it and there is no reason why Maldonado could not.

Except Maldonado seems to be kind of a bonehead too. He knows that he is way too aggressive,but still he says that he won't change his driving. 

[KWSN - DSM]

I wasn't really looking at Maldonado's retirements in that chart, even in the races he has finished he has failed to look impressive.

 

And you think he is better than de Cesaris, Alesi and Grosjean? High praise indeed! 

And all those drivers had/have better race to podium rates than Maldonado has so far, despite their many retirements.

 

I don't know how he is still getting his backers to pay for his drive at this point to be honest.

There has to be a better driver from Venezuela that they can get behind.

 

I am not saying he is better or worse than either of those, I point out that his retirement percentage is not out of league compared to other drivers. I naturally selected the 3 that I did for the crashing, 1 win and team mate connection.

 

Point made above about new wing and on you go is valid, to which extent I do not know.

 

My point simply is that he does not appear more crashprone than many other drivers, that and only that I understood this thread to be about. His talent and talent compared to other drivers not really what I am gauging here.

 

[jestaudio]

Or alternatively he can continue to pay off the poor sods he puts in hospital,

[KWSN - DSM]

Or alternatively he can continue to pay off the poor sods he puts in hospital,

 

Ehhhh what?

[BullHead]

The guy as pointed out above does not statistically stand out as being crashprone, but in the audience psyche he is, and IMO he actually embraced this upon his entrance, the old adage being better to be thought for something than not thought of at all. A mistake on his part I think. But again, and maybe he did it for show, I say his attitude towards dangerous on track behaviour post the Spa incident (was it with Lewis?), showed an immaturity not worthy of a superlicense. I think he's past that now. His Spain win was genuine and well raced. IF he can stay in the game long enough and do something good if he gets a good car again, he may change the public perception that I think he foolishly went along with for namesake. 

[johnmhinds]

Ehhhh what?

 

His dad paid for the hospital bills of the marshall he hit in Monaco in 2005 and Hugo Chavez put some political pressure on Monaco to make them turn his lifetime ban into a fine.

 

He wouldn't even be racing if he didn't have rich parents and friends in high places.

[solochamp07]

Cashtor Faildonado sums him up nicely.

I've referred to him at times as Pasture Mowdalawno.

[emmanuelrubi]

His dad paid for the hospital bills of the marshall he hit in Monaco in 2005 and Hugo Chavez put some political pressure on Monaco to make them turn his lifetime ban into a fine.

 

He wouldn't even be racing if he didn't have rich parents and friends in high places.

 

welcome to the world.

[MikeV1987]

His dad paid for the hospital bills of the marshall he hit in Monaco in 2005 and Hugo Chavez put some political pressure on Monaco to make them turn his lifetime ban into a fine.

 

He wouldn't even be racing if he didn't have rich parents and friends in high places.

 

WOW, I didn't know this.

[apoka]

Hey, give him a break: as of this post, he hasn't crashed in 39 days, 16 hours, 16 minutes and 30 seconds.

They don't seem to update the website anymore as there was a crash in China.

[LuckyStrike1]

Seriously how the hell did he manage to win a race? It still doesn't make sense. Maybe another guy came along disguised as Maldonado? His record otherwise is shocking. Only one other old-school top 6 finish. 

 

 

That was the day when he managed to combine his speed with race craft, smartness and a cool and collected approach. It hasn't happened since. 

[LuckyStrike1]

They don't seem to update the website anymore as there was a crash in China.

 

It's still updated. And with an explanation regarding China. 

[Sash1]

Big balls do not compensate a lack of reflexes and quick thinking.

[metz]

Talent, they all have talent.

He lacks some speed

He has no racecraft. And he's not learning any. Not a smart driver.

He has a plethora of errors, not just during the race but also the days before.

I was hoping he would fix the errors but he is still driving like a rookie.

No, his reputation is deserved.

[thiscocks]

Hopeless!

Neither of which being Alesis fault....

[onemoresolo]

Well, crashing is not necessarily the same as not finishing either. New front wing and go.

 

Indeed. Europe 2012 for example where he crashed into Hamilton on the last lap, but is still classified.

 

Plus, he's deliberately driven into Hamilton and Perez - his incidents are not purely accidental. That sets him apart somewhat.

[Jerem]

His dad paid for the hospital bills of the marshall he hit in Monaco in 2005 and Hugo Chavez put some political pressure on Monaco to make them turn his lifetime ban into a fine.

 

He wouldn't even be racing if he didn't have rich parents and friends in high places.

Monaco is actually the one place where he has the worst record: if retired after crashing every single time he started the race in F1 (2011, 2012, 2013).

[Lotus53B]

Can't see any big balls, but I do see a lot of bollocks

[Gareth]

I am not saying he is better or worse than either of those, I point out that his retirement percentage is not out of league compared to other drivers. 

Retirement % is affected by car reliability, and Maldonado has raced in an era of unprecedented reliability.  So not really a fair comparison if you're trying to work out how often they bin it.

[ViMaMo]

Hope for fans sake he improves his racecraft. Racing is about a lot of things but balls being a part of it.

[Bleu]

The amount of retirements is so much smaller nowadays so it's better to compare Maldonado to other current drivers: