So I'm a big fan of Hamilton, Grosjean, Ricciardo, Magnussen, Hulkenberg, and new ones I like are Albon, Leclerc, and Russell, who I haven't got enough ammunition to grill yet.
Hamilton is an infuriatingly sensitive princess, actually no that's far too demeaning to princesses. We have the likes of Xena, Leia, and the two from Frozen who show that princesses are tough, so Hamilton is certainly not a princess. But he's so fragile and bothered about his image it shows. He is the fastest man on the planet, arguably one of the greatest F1 drivers ever, but he whinges when things go wrong.
Oh no Button beat me at Spa, must post telemetry showing it's not my fault. Oh no Rosberg beat me, must sulk. Oh no Bottas beat me, must... congratulate him on doing an awesome job...
OK he can be a good sport in defeat, but he's shown he's just too fragile a character when he's beaten at times, and over-reactive. And for someone so proud of their faith and so determined to ram it down our throats that he's a man of god, he sure does sound scared on the radio a lot.
Oh no, my engine doesn't feel right, must whine on the radio about it. Oh no, the tyres don't feel right, must tell the world that I won't make it to the end of the race, then proceed to get faster and make it to the end of the race with a win.
I have no issue with the veganinininism as I don't seem to notice that as much, he hasn't turned green or anything (not that I see skin colour), but as a man of such ridiculously strong faith, he should show more faith in his team and car and own abilities during races.
Grosjean needs to learn how to string corners together. Damnit man, how hard can it be to not crash every other race? In 100+ races he hasn't learned to tone it down on first laps, and is still a whiney little turd when something doesn't feel right to him. He's like a toddler in a rocket ship. Can get to some really fast speeds, but can't control it. And no one cares about your family cook books, you're a driver, not a chef.
Ricciardo ran away from a fight, chased money, and doesn't seem to be able to accept when his overtaking has gone too far and relied on others being barged out of the way. A master of overtaking but sometimes believes his own hype and takes it too far. Essentially his wonderfully positive and enthusiastic demeanour sometimes goes overboard in the car and he seems to think everything he does will come out rosy.
Magnussen is just a thug. I love his style and think he has shown glimpses of being a decent person, but he's too much of a Viking for his own good. Sometimes appears to not believe that there's such a thing as being on the inevitable losing side of a battle. I don't know if he wants to take the Max route of getting people to think he's a tough cookie so that he has the mental advantage before a battle even begins, but he hasn't shown anywhere near enough overtaking or racing prowess to have such a forceful on track attitude.
Hulk... well, where's that podium man?! This is the guy who was the next big thing, but any time opportunity knocks for a podium or a win, he panics and stuffs it up. Brazil 2012, Baku 2017 and 2018, he's in great positions and bins it into walls or Hamilton. The guy either wanted the record of most races without a podium so that he'll be remembered for something at least, knowing he wasn't ever going to set the world alight, or he's too nervous near the sharp end. He hasn't really had any standout moments except having some solid front of the midfield drives where he has qualified well and stayed there. Doesn't seem to have the ability to drive the wheels off the car, unless he literally drives it into a wall in Baku and sacrifices a wheel. Not destined for the podium at all. One day his picture will be in the dictionary next to "journeyman."
That was painful... but think I've bashed my faves.