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The funniest quotes from F1


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#1 Branislav

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Posted 16 January 2020 - 12:40

I just look for something in my CD's collection and found this

 

 

Murray Walker

 

1. Murray: "Mansell is slowing it down, taking it easy. OH NO HE ISN'T!!! IT'S A LAP RECORD!!"

2. Murray: "So Bernie [Ecclestone], in the seventeen years since you bought McLaren, which of your many achievements do you think was the most memorable ?"

Bernie answers, "Well I don't remember buying McLaren." [Bernie Ecclestone actually bought Brabham].

3. Murray: "There's a fiery glow coming from the back of the Ferrari"

James: "No Murray, that's his rear safety light"

4. Murray: "What's that? There's a BODY on the track!!!"

James: "Um, I think that that is a piece of BODY-WORK, from someone's car."

5. Spanish GP 1995:

"and Eddie Jordan is in fifth place"...

(actually Eddie Irvine in one of his compatriot Eddie Jordan's cars).

6. "And there's the man IN the green flag!"

7. "Michael Schumacher leading Damon Hill by four tenths of a second or so, because it's moving...[cut to Hill under Schu's rear wing] AND THAT'S NOT FOUR TENTHS OF A SECOND! That's Michael Schumacher!"

8. Murray: "And there are flames coming from the back of Prost's car as he enters the swimming pool."

James: "Well, that should put them out then."

9. "And Damon Hill is coming into the pit lane, yes it's Damon Hill coming into the Williams pit, and Damon Hill in the pit, NO IT'S MICHAEL SCHUMACHER!!!"

10. "And the Williams pit are getting ready for Hill, the tyre coolers are coming off"

11. Murray: "There's a car coming into the pits now, they're so unreliable with all those electronics on board".

James: "Actually, Murray, one of his wheels has just fallen off!"

12. "And this is Ralf Schumacher the youngest driver in f1 at only 21 years old, and of course he is the son of twice world champion Michael!"

13. Canada 1997 And Jacques Villeneuve spins out of his home race, causing Derek Warwick (DW) to correct Murray Waker (MW),

MW: "And Heinz-Harald Frentzen Spins out at Montreal"

DW: "It's Villeneuve, Murray"

MW "IT'S VILLENEUVE, JACQUES VILLENEUVE IS OUT OF THE RACE"

14. Murray : "FERRARI OUT !!! (of the race) Thats Eddie Irvine ! !"

Martin : "That's Eddie Irvine taking his 10 second penalty there".

15. Murray : And Coulthard is now on the inside, AND HE'S GOING THROUGH!!! (add appropriate excitement)

Martin : That's a replay, Murray.

16. "There's THREE Germans here at Hockenheim in the race tomorrow, if they all qualify. Four Germans - the Schumacher brothers, and Frenzten and Heidfeld."

 

Brundle: "Poor old Heinz has tried 57 ways of geting round this Monaco circuit.."

Brundle:"How are the dogs"
Ozzy Osbourne: "Probably at home, sh1tt1ing everywhere"

Ecclestone:" ...my new Digital F1 channel with all the flash pictures"
Brundle: "Is that the one where you invite your mates round and double the viewing figures...."

 

Ron Dennis, way back in '98 (or was it '99?)
"We are going to make Ferrari's drought last another twenty years"

 

Interviewer: "Michael, without Bridgestone today would you win or would you lose. How do you think?"
MS: "It would be very difficult to run without tyres."

 

"A number two driver with a number one mouth" .. Damon Hill on Eddie Irvine ..

 

here's taken from DC and one of Spice Girls' member on a party...

DC: 'Hello, my name is Coulthard. I'm a driver'
SG: 'Ok, will you park my car?'

 

 

one of F1's commentator from 80's in a Croatian TV - Mladen Delic

And the race started , it was a poor start... but what the h... is going on??? no one overtaking no one!... just look at them... they are driving swerves.. they are so slow.... is this some kind of a strike ... this is scandal this is scandal ... i don't remember seeing that..."

(A minute of silence and then ...)

"dear spectators I am sorry, this was just a warm-up lap!"

 

 

"So Kimi, what do you do in Finland in the winter?"
Raikkonen: "Well in Finland there's only two things to do anyway - fishing and f**king, and in winter the fishing is not so good..."


Edited by Branislav, 16 January 2020 - 12:42.


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#2 Henri Greuter

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Posted 16 January 2020 - 15:23

Lauda's answer in '77 on the question if Reutemann is a teammate or an opponent;  "Neither"

 

Mario being confused about a anti-rollbar setting, what happens when he pushes the Button:

The mechanic answering: "Mario, always remember, when you pull it in it's stiff, when you pull it out it's soft"



#3 Zoe

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Posted 16 January 2020 - 15:26

Basically a lot of Mika Hakkinen quotes.



#4 Loosenut

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Posted 17 January 2020 - 00:13

I read in either Autosport or F1 Racing, a journalist mentioned to Michael Schumacher that TWR Arrows will pay Damon Hill 6 million to drive for them.
Michael said "What? Lira?"

 

A bit below the belt, but it was funny..



#5 JacnGille

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Posted 17 January 2020 - 01:25

Lauda's answer in '77 on the question if Reutemann is a teammate or an opponent;  "Neither"

 

And when Carlos approached team mate Alan Jones asking if they could end their feud and "bury the hatchet" Jonesy replied "In your back, mate. In your Back!"



#6 ensign14

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Posted 17 January 2020 - 08:36



#7 PlatenGlass

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Posted 17 January 2020 - 09:55

https://www.youtube....h?v=XHS53krjxkg

 

(Another James Hunt classic. Not really a quote, more a whole speech.)


Edited by PlatenGlass, 17 January 2020 - 09:56.


#8 New Britain

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Posted 17 January 2020 - 10:58

Ron Dennis speaking of Flavio Briatore: "I have never known of anyone who won so many motor races while knowing so little about motor racing."



#9 chrisj

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Posted 17 January 2020 - 14:26

Every time Hakkinen referred to Schumacher as "the Michael".

 

Any time Toto Wolff says Mercedes is the underdog.



#10 kumo7

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Posted 19 January 2020 - 02:09

I kinda recall DC repeatedly said, "This is my year" of sorts...  :up:



#11 Fatgadget

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Posted 19 January 2020 - 07:28

I kinda recall DC repeatedly said, "This is my year" of sorts...  :up:

That one has achieved urban myth status!

A bit like Michael Caine's..Not a lot of people know that.



#12 Les

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Posted 19 January 2020 - 10:52

https://www.crash.ne...year-is-my-year



#13 JG

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Posted 20 January 2020 - 13:17

"The Michael" Classic Mika.

To be fair, Schumi really was "The Michael" in F1.