47 replies to this topic

[klipywitz]

Argueably, Piquet was the funniest driver to ever drive a F1 car..

There are so many stories that include him, that I wish those who remember could share them here. I was too young, back then, to remember all of them. ....

"Driving in Monaco is like driving a motorcycle in your room"; or when he peed into his teammates gas tank, or when he said that Mansell was the fastest stupid in the world... Hehehhe.. Share away, please!

[Marco94]

My favorite one is when Williams had a testing session somewhere. Mansell was making lots of noise about the fact that his internal organs were disposing of comsumed food at a rather alarming rate. Piquet, ever the gentleman, then made pretty sure that al the toiletpaper in all toilets he knew on the track was gone.

[Niky]

My ex boss used to tell me a story about Nelson that was very controversial at the time... Nelson was surrounding by journalists, at the lobby of the hotel, waiting for my ex boss (at that time brand manager of BAT Brazil). All the people around him asked and asked about the confrontation between Piquet and the "newcomer" Senna. Joking, Piquet said something, and then run to the car parked otside the hotel. He locked the door behind and said something like: well, I did it. I said Ayrton Senna is gay. Now, you guys, fix it!. He just smiled... BAT people, cried!!! hahahaha


Other story: at the press conferences, Piquet used to put one finger inside his nose. Then, he put another finger in his mouth.... but ALLWAYS the press thought it was the same finger!!! (agggg)

[klipywitz]

Hahaha!

More! More! MOre!

[Gil Bouffard]

Not so much of a humorous story, but a fact. Back when Roberto Moreno was starting out he used to wear Nelson's cast off racing shoes.

[Louis Mr. F1]

here's something ugly:

i don't remember when, possibly in his Brabham days. At that time, when a mechanic had to change something on the car, he had to stick his head inside the cockpit and work on it.

One time, with Piquet sitting in the car, he asked a mechanic to work on something and the mechanic duly followed the instruction and put his head inside the cockpit and worked on it. Since the cockpit was tight and not easy to move, Piquet knew his chance had come. He deliberately farted, several times. The poor mechanic had to endure all this while still fixing the car. Piquet was laughing to death.

this is Nelson.

[SennasCat]

Going back to early 80s Australia used to have a Grand Prix but only for Formula Atlantic/Ralt RT4 sort of cars.

Piquet, Prost, Lauda etc came out one year. Piquet hadn't driven similar for a few years so a test run was set up for him at the now defunct Amaroo Park (referred to as the world's longest right hand corner) - all twists and not much runoff.

Piquet on the second or third flying lap was under the track record. A senior manager of the facility shortly retired up the hill to the shop - stating that he didn't want to see the reigning world champion kill himself.

The day went off ok and Piquet lived to fight another day.

He was just one of those sort of guys.

PS Didn't he have several current girlfriends turn up to see him whilst in hospital after a crash at Indy???

Steve Williams
Sydney Australia

[Niky]

Steve, I don’t know about the hospital visits, but I can tell you he made a huge party on his boat and his four wives with sons and daughters include, were there!!!!

[ebe]

I remember this one:

In 1986 at the Australian GP - short before NM's tyre blew:
NP was driving in front of NM, AP leading, NM could not be WDC with the current positions, but NP could not be either.

NP activated the radio, asked the pit and Frank Williams:
'Now how much is it Nigel worth for the championship, if I move over ? 50 000$ or 100 000$ ?'

(In fact it did not matter, Nigels tyre blew, Prost won and was champion)

....
another story:

on some occasion on a free session for a GP Piquet exchanged the
radio frequencies of his radio to the one NM. So NP could hear everything NM was talking to P Head.

Later on he asked Head the same things NM asked him before on radio. Image Head's face, hearing this once again !!

....
and another one:

In his late time with Brabham Piquet came into the pits in the middle of a GP. He suffered from a mechanical problem - they did not know what it was, when he came in.
He stopped and indicated quickly and desperately to the front wheels, and the Brabham boys changed the two tyres in no-time.

But all Nelson was doing - he climbed out of the car and laughed and said, that it was all over.

[dmj]

As a Senna fan I used to hate Piquet as much as Prost, maybe even more because of him starting these gay rumors... And I never changed my mind: I still don't like him. But I am pretty sure that he would be one of drivers you could have most fun in company with... So, two more stories:
Piquet used to drive his Mercedes-Benz 450 SEL 6.9 through London streets at ridiculous speed. In rain, he used to intentionally splash all pedestrians he could. But sometimes he prepared more extraordinary show for them: he would go to a crossing or turn with apparently too much speed, his car would start to slide uncontrolably (at least that is what onlookers thought), usually into direction of crowd. When panic started, just a moment before crash would occured, Piquet would "regain the control" of car (of course he never actually lost it) and drive away...
What a brat!
Second story I heard is from his early days in Brasil, when he and a younger friend of him, called Roberto Moreno, worked on Piquet's car (a formula VW, I think) all night before the race. Later, they had to travel some distance (a few hours driving) to race circuit so Piquet let Moreno drive his Beetle that towed race car. He tried to catch some sleepin the meantime, so that he will be fresh for race. Problem was, Moreno was some 13 years old at the moment and he never drove a car before! So, a few hours later, on a motorway, he shaked Piquet's arm to wake him up: "What's going on, are we came to circuit?" "Err... no, please show me how to change the gears..." (good story, regardless of truth, isn't it?)

[JohnS]

Are all these stories supposed to make Piquet sound like the life and soul of the party?

Is it funny that a millionaire driver plays practical jokes on his mechanics?

Is it amusing to get his mechanics to change his tyres needlessly?

Is it funny that he farts on them?

[rdrcr]

Well, yes

Yes and

Yes... John, if it's taken in the right manner.... as they say, "F*** 'em if they can't take a joke!"



One of the classic tantrums has to be from the 1982 German Grand Prix where Piquet, leading, was coming up to lap back marker Eliseo Salazar. As the two approached the Ostcurve chicane neither backed off and the inevitable collision happened. Once Piquet's car came to rest, he jumped out and tried to beat up Salazar. This led to a comical mix of flailing punches and kicks from Piquet that didn't seem to hit their target properly. Certainly brightened up that race!

[ensign14]

Piquet tested the RAM that Eliseo was struggling to qualify in 1983 and declared it to be as good as a Brabham. So why was it not up the front of the grid? No animosity there, surely?

I cannot forgive Piquet for giving up when he was at Lotus. A 3 time World Champ should have been substantially faster than Nakajima, rather than DNQing.

[JohnS]

Originally posted by rdrcr
if it's taken in the right manner.... as they say, "F*** 'em if they can't take a joke!"

Well, I disagree. It's all very well playing practical jokes on a team-mate (Senna and Berger were always doing it) but it's another doing it to someone who has no comeback. Let's say that one of Piquet's mechanics didn't find it amusing - does he have the option of telling the world champion to go f*** himself? I don't think so.

[Mark Beckman]

When Keke Rosberg had a press gathering to read out his retirement from F1 racing from a prepared statement, Nelson then held his own press conferance later and announced his intention NOT to retire from F1 using the whole of Keke Rosbergs prepared statement word for word only varying the words to stay rather than leave !

I happen to think Nelson's acheivements being World Champ 3 times in 3 clearly differing era's of car arent as reconised as they could be, he is one of the greats although he was easy to dislike being an Alan Jones fan in his early era .

JohnS if you dont like what you read then dont read it, its a choice you make, simply dont open this thread and save yourself from the pain.

[marglar]

Originally posted by JohnS
Let's say that one of Piquet's mechanics didn't find it amusing - does he have the option of telling the world champion to go f*** himself? I don't think so.

I think that the majority of people have a sense of humour though, I certainly don't get upset with people who pull practical jokes on me, i just get even (and i believe that if the mechanics wanted to get even they could have). Telling someone to go f*** themselves over a fart is just silly.

I think it would have been fun to work with a guy like Nelson, someone unpredictable yet funny. Environments like that are easy to work in because it tends to relieve a bit of stress and pressure and adds to the comraderie.

I only know one story about Nelson that hasn't already been told. At one of Brabhams first test sessions with BMW, Nelson showed up wearing an old WW2 storm trooper helmet painted like his racing helmet!

[Lutz G]

Originally posted by rdrcr
One of the classic tantrums has to be from the 1982 German Grand Prix where Piquet, leading, was coming up to lap back marker Eliseo Salazar. As the two approached the Ostcurve chicane neither backed off and the inevitable collision happened. Once Piquet's car came to rest, he jumped out and tried to beat up Salazar. This led to a comical mix of flailing punches and kicks from Piquet that didn't seem to hit their target properly. Certainly brightened up that race!

Here's a slideshow of this "fight"

http://home.nikocity...ke/piquet82.zip

IMO later BMW said Piquet would have retired anyway a few laps later...

BTW: Talking about Salazar. After he tangled with Sarah Fisher (IRL/Vegas 2000) he had some rude words about her being too inexperienced and stuff. Well Eliseo, still remembering Hockenheim '82?

[Doug Nye]

Originally posted by Niky
Joking, Piquet said something, and then run to the car parked otside the hotel. He locked the door behind and said something like: well, I did it. I said Ayrton Senna is gay. Now, you guys, fix it!. He just smiled... BAT people, cried!!! hahahaha

I think there was rather more edge to this than you might suspect. I distinctly recall Piquet parading in front of Senna somewhere wearing a tee-shirt emblazoned with something like ' BRAZIL'S FASTEST STRAIGHT F1 DRIVER'. If this was a mind game, it didnae work very well...

DCN

[glorius&victorius]

Originally posted by marglar

I only know one story about Nelson that hasn't already been told. At one of Brabhams first test sessions with BMW, Nelson showed up wearing an old WW2 storm trooper helmet painted like his racing helmet!

hilarious!!!! Guess the german engineers were shocked and ashamed!!!

[Ray Bell]

Originally posted by Doug Nye
I think there was rather more edge to this than you might suspect. I distinctly recall Piquet parading in front of Senna somewhere wearing a tee-shirt emblazoned with something like ' BRAZIL'S FASTEST STRAIGHT F1 DRIVER'. If this was a mind game, it didnae work very well...

I wonder what Emmo thought of that!

My only recollection of Piquet and mind games was the one Jonesy played on him at Monaco... closed up by 1.8 seconds or something in one lap (might have been 1.4...) and then the rev limiter was working overtime for the balance of Nelson's time in the race... which was about a lap and two thirds!

[Doug Nye]

You know Ray, your little spherical yellow bloke there is looking terribly out of breath.... Shouldn't he slow down a bit, or is that valve bounce?

DCN

[Ray Bell]

He goes out to pasture as soon as Hans comments on him...

He is pleased you took the time to voice your concern, however, and he says he hasn't seen or heard valve bounce since getting rid of his first FJ Holden.

[Henri Greuter]

Great Piquet stories???


How about this one?

Ending up in Methodist hospital after crashing at Indy, a call being made for Mrs. Nelson Piquet
and three beautiful women, none of them knowing the other finding out about another for the first time.

One year later:

Nigel Mansell arriving at Indy after having crashed at Phoenix in his first ever Oval event. Nelson `welcoming`him with the comment: "have you already made an arrangement for a hospital room all for yourself cause you might need it."


Especially because of the latter story, allow me to say this:
"At first sight: Another "great" (....) personality this Nelson Piquet"

Great driver, that's for sure.




Real practical jokers?

Dieter Quester, Hans Stuck and Gerhard Berger. (sounds as if I'm promoting BMW drivers but that's not the intention.)

The best story I remember of any of those guys (can this one really be true?

Quester and Berger were not that fond of another but drove BMW in the touring car championship.
One race htye had organised to go to the track together but Berger, scheduled to drive war ready to leave much earlier than anticipated that he called Dieter and told that if he wasn't down at the door within 5 minutes he had to go to the track himself.
A little over 5 minutes later, Berger enters the lobby, sees a lot of consternation, caused by a butt naked Dieter Quester. When Berger askes astounished what's going on, Quester tells him that Gerhard had said he would leave in 5 minutes and knew for sure he would do that thus, despite the fact he wasn't entirely ready yet, he made sure that he, Quester made it to the hall in time for the drive to the track.....

Wanna have a real laugh about driver jokes?
Let's open a thread on Quester, Stuck and Berger!

The funniest drivers in F1?
Piquet?
Hmmmmm....



Henri Greuter

[Ray Bell]

I think there are some more historic drivers, too, who were notably funny...

Don would remember lots of stories, having been there when the likes of Collins, Schell, Hawthorn & co were around.

[Henri Greuter]

Ray,

I'm with you on this one. For example the story from, I believe the late 50's or very early 60's that a buch of drivers pulled out a joke on one of their collegues (i believe Harry Schell)
His rental car was a Fiat 500 and his collegues managed to get that tiny Fiat with the hotel of that particular driver. The story as it was told to me was that they actually got the Fiat in his hotel room!
Now I know that the Fiat 500 was tiny but.....

henri greuter

[dmj]

Originally posted by glorius&victorius


hilarious!!!! Guess the german engineers were shocked and ashamed!!!

Probably. They eventually decided to upgrade Piquet's car with so called "Hitler Prom". Now the reasons for it seem more obvious...;)

[deangelis86]

Originally posted by JohnS
Well, I disagree. It's all very well playing practical jokes on a team-mate (Senna and Berger were always doing it) but it's another doing it to someone who has no comeback. Let's say that one of Piquet's mechanics didn't find it amusing - does he have the option of telling the world champion to go f*** himself? I don't think so.

I agree, and I think that it all depends on your sense of humour. There are some things that Nelson has done that have given me a really good laugh, but some of his other antics have been less than funny.

The following is a good example of when the humour missed the mark for me. Mansell recalled in his Autobiography that when he had his first fall out with Piquet, it was when he was having his ribs persistantly poked by the Brazilian days after he had injured them during a crash(?).

Nige grabbed his arm and threatened to break it should he carry on. Irrespective of the fact that the victim happened to be Nigel Mansell, I think that would deserve a slap in most peoples opinion.

[Henri Greuter]

Piquets a joker?

As is obvious, it depends on how your sense of humor is.

In my opinion: peeing in the tank of the car of your opponents, taking away the toilet paper at a track and so on. in my countrye we have a description for that kind of humor.
literally it translates into:

Underpants humor.

A piece of clothing Nelson seemed to have difficulties with anyway....

Besides that, taking out all toilet paper off the track.
Reading over the last message too, that confirms a thought I had about the so called `joke`(Hahaha!!!) with the toilet paper.
I wondered, would Nelson have been inspired to pull of the same joke if it wasn't his much behated teammate Nigel who had the stomach difficulties but for example, Patrick Head?
having read the last message? I don't think so!
That doesn't mean I am a fan of Mansell. I only have my suspicions about what kind of relationship Nelson had with certain persons and inspired the kind of `jokes `he pulled off.
And doesn't take away my respect for what he achieved behind the wheel in his best days.

Henri Greuter

[Gary C]

I used to know a guy who was on the Williams test team in the Piquet / Mansell days. I once asked him who he got along with better. Straight away when I mentioned Mansell his eyes were raised to the ceiling and he didn't say anything. When I said ' And Nelson?' I couldn't stop him, he said the whole team loved the guy! Nuff said??

[rijdemaar]

I think it was during a test at Kyalami during his Brabham years,that piquet did his stuff
to a female reporter/photographer,
when she left her camara unguarded in the Brabham pits,he unziped got his dick out
and took a picture of it,She must have had a big (small?) surprise when she developed
the film.
However she new whose it was!There was a bit of Piquets belt compleet with drivers name
on the picture

Rob
http://www.fastpaintings.com/

[Ross Stonefeld]

im with JohnS, laughter at the misfortune of others is just mean and obnoxious. All these stories of Senna and Berger dropping important briefcases out of helicopters, filling each other's hotel rooms with animals, etc is just immature and would soon piss me right off. Hell I dont even see the humour in the F1 standard of smearing someone with cake if their birthday was held on a GP weekend. And could you imagine in the current state of airline security if you showed up for checkin and someone had messed with your passport?

I was testing at Road America a few weeks ago and myself and about 9 other drivers all went mini-golfing divided into two groups of 5. Since it was such a low key and post-alcohol match late at night, we started screwing with each other. We'd place rocks on the putting green and act like they were supposed to be there, fill the hole with leaves so the ball wouldnt go in and they wouldnt notice it until they were standing over it, etc. Just real dorky low grade humour. But no one 'suffered' because of it. Until we plugged up one of the holes that was the tunnel between two greens and ended up shutting down the entire place for a while....

[klipywitz]

Originally posted by JohnS
Are all these stories supposed to make Piquet sound like the life and soul of the party?

Is it funny that a millionaire driver plays practical jokes on his mechanics?

Is it amusing to get his mechanics to change his tyres needlessly?

Is it funny that he farts on them?

Yes

Yes

Yes

and Yes.

[dmj]

I'd say that our final judgement mostly has to depend on how a joke was made - and would a return joke be accepted well or not. It seems to me that Piquet was loved by everyone in team and that certainly wouldn't be so if mechanics thought of him as someone who intentionally treats them farting into their faces... If he really was so loved that must mean that he was willing to accept a joke if he was a target too. I don't see as a valid point that mechanic couldn't say f-word to him - question is if they could return a joke and do something to Nelson. Having no evidence except fact that he seemed to be so well loved, I believe they could do it.

[David M. Kane]

There are many, many things a mechanic can do to a driver funny or not.
Trust me no intelligent driver would abuse his mechanic or mechanics and expect to get away with it.

[speedmaster]

Piquet said to Mansell: You have the two ugliest women in the world. Your wife and your wife's statue (the one Mansell placed in front of his house).

We can discuss Piquet's humor but so far the most complete driver Brazil ever had. Senna was the fastest and the one I've cheered for but Piquet was a smart ass. His only dumb move: Try Indy where he end up closing his career.

[byrkus]

After his Indy accident, he came into pits for the first time, still walking with difficulties, and he shouted: "I will have a baby in August... and another in October..."

When he negotiated with Frank Williams for 1986, they supposedly met in middle of the night at some parking place. After long conversation, Frank (who managed to come easier from negotiations), asked smiling "Have you ever been in situation like this before??" Nelson responded "Yes actually, when I was about 16. But - she was much prettier than you are!!"

[king_crud]

In one of my GP season videos, either 88 or 89, there is a shot over Nelsons shouler as he is sitting in his car, all strapped in ready to go for qualifying. The mechanic hands him a note pad and a pen, with what looks like notes on the set up or telemetry, but no. The note pad is actually a cartoon book of people having sex but without the blokes bits drawn in, so Nelson starts drawing in what goes where. A man very focussed on the job!

[lipestana]

Piquet was a genius in mental games.

Recently, he admitted in an interview that after his Imola accident in 87, he lost some of the ability to measure the distance of things, in a way that it was hard to brake as late as he used to.

He said something like:

¨- Mansell could be a dumb ass, but I have to admit one thing: the guy was fast. I couldn´t face him only in the track, I has to destabilize him.¨

Well, he did it! Apart from Senna / Prost, peharps Piquet was the only champion that worked outside the track, as well as being fast inside!

[Doug Nye]

Piquet absolutely was not loved by the Team Lotus mechanics during his residence there....

DCN

[lipestana]

A very well know brazilian journalist wrote recently some highlights about Piquet:

¨Piquet fooled the rules in brazilian Formula Super Vê, in Formula 3 and in Formula One, with Gordon Murray´s partnership. He learnt to win outside the track with his boss Bernie Ecclestone (he refers to complaints, deceits an all), understood what it was to use politics to help yourself with Frank Williams, and to manipulate psychologically weaker oponnents like Nigel Mansell. He learnt all the undercover rules that guide the F1 circus.¨

¨On his first meeting with Gerard Ducarouge on Lotus, he openly said tha car was a pile of sh*t¨

I miss this kind of authentic behavior. Nowadays the drivers piss on their pants whenever a team boss or a big sponsor approaches... Piquet would tell them not to **** up. What he wanted was to drive, not to please the ¨bosses¨. This kind of behavior is what made F1 the flop that it is now. No more racing, just business.

[lipestana]

Probably, as he said that. You know, the guy had three titles on the bag, is not a boy anymore, and then he arrives in a team and when he gets there, everything was completely different from what he thought...

[lipestana]

Some Piquet quotes:

¨My financial side got terrible, but soon I started to win, and that helped to stand life inside a truck, without money to eat and to confront the adversities of a strange land.¨ - in 77, competing in European F-3

¨Sure, I am happy. Very happy. But, I don´t know, it´s a strange sensation... It´s like when you wait anxiously for a new toy, and then you get that, and the fun isn´t the same. But it´s a good feeling, compensation for the work, for making everything right, driving well. This is the goos feeling - not only for being a victory in Formula One.¨ - 1980 - Firts victory in Formula One

¨Alan Jones was world champion last year with loads of luck and after taking me out of track on the penultimate race. Only he is a stupid and is desperate for not being able to beat his teammate Reutemman.¨- 1981

[lipestana]

More quotes:

¨On Formula One, there are two kinds of drivers: the ones who get there by talent and the ones who pay to drive a few races and then go back home to live remembering the experiences. For me, this Salazar guy can go back home¨ 1982, after the fight with Salazar.

¨If I win the championship, it will be sensational. If I don´t, it´ll be good too. At least I won´t have to face that mess of reporters.¨1983

¨When I come to Brazil, I meet 400 cleared people in the paddock. Six should know what is F1. The rest knows nothing, only ask stupid things, that doesn´t have anything to do, and want to do sensationalism with other subjects.¨ 1985

[man]

Piquet making fun of Prost's distinctive nose.

[Greatest]

I once heard a strange but funny story about Piquet (I hope I'm not passing on a fictitious story, maybe you guys can check the truth behind it):

Nelson somehow managed to lock his former boss inside his (rental?) car and to set the car on fire!!! If this practical joke is true, I would have wanted to be there on spot as a witness and to see Nelson's boss' face...!

[sterling49]

Originally posted by Ross Stonefeld
im with JohnS, laughter at the misfortune of others is just mean and obnoxious. All these stories of Senna and Berger dropping important briefcases out of helicopters, filling each other's hotel rooms with animals, etc is just immature and would soon piss me right off.

That may be the case, but I was amused when I read of Berger tying his teamates laces together, but I cannot think who that was at the time or where I read it!

[Maldwyn]

The book of Piquet stories needs updating with this piece of news:

Three-time Formula One champion Nelson Piquet began taking a driving education course on Monday in Brazil after having his license revoked for racking up too many traffic violations, local media reported.

Piquet lost his license in June after receiving a slew of speeding and parking tickets. His wife, Viviane, also had her license taken away for bad driving and joined her husband in the mandatory driver awareness course.

"I think we have to pay for our mistakes," Piquet, 54, told local news agency G1. "It's not even just a speeding problem. I got tickets for all kinds of reasons, for things like parking where I shouldn't."

Piquet and his wife will have to attend 30 hours of classes over eight days and pass an exam before regaining their licenses.

http://www.autosport...ne.php/id/61229

[COUGAR508]

How the mighty fall! To be fair to him, Nelson seems to be accepting his punishment with some humility and his usual humour.