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Ferrari fire entire pit crew!

Started by JForce , Aug 22 2002 03:35

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23 replies to this topic

#1 JForce

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Posted 22 August 2002 - 03:35

The Ferrari Team fired their entire Pit Crew Yesterday

The announcement was followed by Ferrari's Decision to take advantage of the New Zealand Government's "Work For the Dole" Scheme and hire unemployed youths from South Auckland.

The decision to hire them was brought on by a recent documentary on how unemployed youths in South Auckland were able to remove a set of car wheels in less than 6 seconds without proper equipment or tools, whereas Ferrari's existing crew can only do it in 8 seconds with all the hi-tech tools at their disposal.

This was thought to be an excellent yet bold move by Ferrari Management, as most races are won and lost in the pits. It would allow Ferrari to have an advantage over every other team.

However Ferrari expectations were easily exceeded, as during the Crews first practice session, not only were "da boyz" able to change the tyres in under 6 seconds but within 20 seconds they had resprayed and rebadged the vehicle, and sold it to the McLaren Team for 4-dozen Lion Red stubbies and a copy of American Pie on DVD.

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#2 Nikolas Garth

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Posted 22 August 2002 - 03:42

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#3 garth_b

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Posted 22 August 2002 - 03:48

Another export winner from The Land of the Long White Cloud :up:

I knew there was a reason we were upskilling those guys.

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#4 Nasty McBastard

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Posted 22 August 2002 - 04:32

thats crap. everyone knows there are no unemployed in new zealand....

all the unemployed kiwis are over in bondi bludging off our govt.

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#5 JForce

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Posted 22 August 2002 - 04:44

Originally posted by Nasty McBastard
thats crap. everyone knows there are no unemployed in new zealand....

all the unemployed kiwis are over in bondi bludging off our govt.

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#6 Riker!

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Posted 22 August 2002 - 04:47

That joke is just the rip off of the Australian verison replace, South Auckland with any of Sydneys dodgy suburbs (all of them).

thats crap. everyone knows there are no unemployed in new zealand....

all the unemployed kiwis are over in bondi bludging off our govt.

Your damn right the ram rooters do!

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#7 teiz

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Posted 22 August 2002 - 11:50

Originally posted by Riker!
That joke is just the rip off of the Australian verison replace, South Auckland with any of Sydneys dodgy suburbs (all of them).

And the Australian version is a rip off of the Dutch version. Replace Sydney with Amsterdam (and unemployed youths with maroccan youths)...

I bet there's one for every country in the world... I guess only the person who thought it up knows which is the original...

Thijs

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#8 Liam

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Posted 22 August 2002 - 12:05

All the F1 pit crews can change the wheels in 4.5 seconds, it's the fuel that takes longer :drunk:

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#9 heki

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Posted 22 August 2002 - 12:30

Liam, that was a terrible line... better luck next time ;)

Aren't you blonde, by the way?

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#10 JForce

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Posted 22 August 2002 - 21:07

Originally posted by Liam
All the F1 pit crews can change the wheels in 4.5 seconds, it's the fuel that takes longer

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#11 VAR1016

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Posted 22 August 2002 - 21:15

Originally posted by JForce
The Ferrari Team fired their entire Pit Crew Yesterday

However Ferrari expectations were easily exceeded, as during the Crews first practice session, not only were "da boyz" able to change the tyres in under 6 seconds but within 20 seconds they had resprayed and rebadged the vehicle, and sold it to the McLaren Team for 4-dozen Lion Red stubbies and a copy of American Pie on DVD.

Well at least that shows enterprise.

If it were Manchester - or almost anywhere in the UK, they would steal the car and when they found that they couldn't handbrake it around some supermarket car-park, they just set fire to it.

Or maybe just set fire to it anyway.

PdeRL :smoking:

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#12 Raelene

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Posted 22 August 2002 - 21:31

LOL

what's wrong with South Auckland - it's a lovely multicultural place to live.

Long live Otara ;);)

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#13 JForce

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Posted 22 August 2002 - 21:42

Originally posted by Raelene
LOL

what's wrong with South Auckland - it's a lovely multicultural place to live.

Long live Otara ;);)

Multicultural? :lol:

Nah, Otara's cool...the markets rock :up:

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#14 Chui

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Posted 23 August 2002 - 01:55

Originally posted by teiz

And the Australian version is a rip off of the Dutch version. Replace Sydney with Amsterdam (and unemployed youths with maroccan youths)...

I bet there's one for every country in the world... I guess only the person who thought it up knows which is the original...

Thijs

Yep, rumor is that some guy in the US penned it. It could be any large city in the US, unfortunately... Especially if you drive a Honda/Acura Integra

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#15 Sean L

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Posted 23 August 2002 - 02:11

I've seen something similar with South African garage attendants.

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#16 indycarjunkie

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Posted 23 August 2002 - 03:03

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#17 RedFever

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Posted 23 August 2002 - 17:54

Does this mean that from now on we will see the Ferrari crew invade the paddock minutes before the start, getting in a semi-circle and start screaming some incomprehensible chanting? I guess the team will now be known as the All Reds.................. :smoking:

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#18 EnzoHonda

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Posted 23 August 2002 - 18:48

Williams should hire some of these "unemployed youths" to steal a few sets of Bridgestones for the race.

In a related story, Arrows has hired a gas attendant from a Shell station for the re-fueling position. Tom Walkinshaw said the reason for this decision was: "He's just as fast as our current guy... but we only have to pay him minimum wage."

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#19 Option1

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Posted 23 August 2002 - 23:51

Originally posted by EnzoHonda
Williams should hire some of these "unemployed youths" to steal a few sets of Bridgestones for the race.

In a related story, Arrows has hired a gas attendant from a Shell station for the re-fueling position. Tom Walkinshaw said the reason for this decision was: "He's just as fast as our current guy... but we only have to pay him minimum wage."

Mind you, I understand they're having a hard time getting him to stop smoking that damn cigarette during pit stops.

Neil

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#20 AndersF1

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Posted 24 August 2002 - 01:24

Originally posted by VAR1016

If it were Manchester - or almost anywhere in the UK, they would steal the car and when they found that they couldn't handbrake it around some supermarket car-park, they just set fire to it.

Or maybe just set fire to it anyway.

PdeRL

Did they work on Verstappen's Benetton in -94?

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#21 VAR1016

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Posted 24 August 2002 - 20:06

Originally posted by AndersF1

Did they work on Verstappen's Benetton in -94?

Reminds me of that terrible "Sun" headline when Pedro Diniz's car caught fire.

the paper showed a picture under the headline "Diniz in the oven"

GROAN

PdeRL :smoking:

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#22 kouks

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Posted 25 August 2002 - 23:02

Originally posted by Nasty McBastard
thats crap. everyone knows there are no unemployed in new zealand....

all the unemployed kiwis are over in bondi bludging off our govt.

Please don't bag the Kiwi's in Australia. They are the only ones keeping our rental market afloat at the moment.

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#23 black magic

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Posted 26 August 2002 - 00:10

just to inform the ignorant aussies.

the stats in fact show that the rate of unemployment in nzers living in australia is in fact LOWER than the national average. sorry to dispell the myth. does seem to make them feel good though

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#24 JForce

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Posted 26 August 2002 - 00:13

Originally posted by RedFever
Does this mean that from now on we will see the Ferrari crew invade the paddock minutes before the start, getting in a semi-circle and start screaming some incomprehensible chanting? I guess the team will now be known as the All Reds..................

Hell yes.. :up: